As you well know, Dandytown is a fourth-world totalitarian nightmare state, and thus very little reliable information can be gleaned about them. Nevertheless, there is some information that the OIA has made public, so that the good people of Oreoville can be fully and faithfully informed about the realities of the situation.

Dandytown is an abomination upon the very concepts of life and liberty. Its most distinguishing feature is the imperfect, semi-circular wall which surrounds it. Blood Cult leader Dandycorn claims that this wall is being built to “protect” Dandytown from the “imperialist machinations of the decadent west”. The sad truth is that this wall is being built to keep his mindless thralls caged within Dandytown.

This is a sad realization when you think about it. And if we as Oreovillians are ever to be able to look at ourselves in the mirror and respect ourselves, we must listen to the better angels of our nature and liberate the tortured souls of Dandytown. Peace for all can only be gained through immediate and decisive war. The desperate and starving masses of Dandytown are depending on our courage and our initiative to free them.

In the end, these facts beg a simple but fundamental question: Are you for freedom, or are you against it? Will you spread freedom, or greedily hoard it? If you do not wish to free the huddled serfs of Dandytown from their cruel and vile slavedrivers, then you are not a true citizen of Oreoville (and may no longer be protected by our generous human rights legislation in the future).